Wednesday, November 16, 2011

A Step-by-Step to becoming "Classy"

This is a condensed list of the steps to becoming a classy individual.  This is inspired by a real article on  Wiki-How accessible right here -->

This definitely made me smile a little at how shallow people can be. But they are some generally good rules to follow.  And remember, stay classy (:

1. Use the Golden Rule
                You can't be truly classy if you are mean to the less-classy girls out there.
2. Choose your battles, Choose your friends.
                Not a whole lot is worth fighting for. Stand up for people who need it and stay away from mean
3. Choose your words.
                "The classy individual listens more than he/she speaks."

4. Do not Insult, Gossip, or Slander.
                Obviously these things are not nice or classy.
5. Be Independent.
                 a.k.a. be nice but not a push-over.
6. Be stylish but do not give in to trends.
                 nobody is going to consider you classy if you are wearing your p.j.'s to class but going broke    
                 because you want to buy everything that is currently in style is also not classy.
7. Ask for help and seek wisdom.
                 Even a classy person can't know everything.
8. Be responsible and considerate.
                 This is also a good idea for anybody living in a college dorm.
9. Be knowledgeable and aware.
                 Watch the news and read a newspaper.
10. Be real.
                  Except if you were really "being real" you wouldn't be reading a "how-to" on becoming a classy 
                  person. /:

Brought to you by Jenny Matlock's Alphabe-Thursday

All the World is a Hot Mess

I was almost scammed today/last night.
That would have been terrible...they could have taken all of the $100 dollars in my checking account!
And it all started with one stinkin' dollar. 
Actually, it all really started because I wanted to watch Sons of Anarchy online but FX won't let me.
So anyways,
I was trying to find it online, and signed up for a website that would let me.
It said it was free, and you just had to pay per episode...
So I went against better judgement and signed up, giving my card number.
I then proceed to search for my show with the hot bikers in it,
and came up empty.
I continued on with my life, did boring college things, at some wings, an went to bed.
Waking up this morning, I had an e-mail from the bank
"your card has suspicious activity on it, it was charged by and international account"
Well, shoot.
It was only $1. But that could have turned into a whole lot more.
So I called the bank at the lovely time of 6:50 a.m.
And they fixed it.
Then I called the stupid internet-fraud-charge-you-without-permission-company
And cancelled my "free" subscription.
And now I feel like a big fat donkey-butt.
Because an 18 year-old college student should definately know better than that.
Luckily, my $100 is safe and sound
And I didn't have to fly across the sea to get my $1 back.
Thank goodness for 24-hour customer service.

My question is this:
What kind of person makes a fraudulent business?
My answer is this:
The kind that I will probably not be meeting inside the pearly gates of heaven.
Then my brain told me this:
That's not nice, take it back and stop being judgemental.
They did try to take me for all I'm worth.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

If You Really Knew Me...

I did a post like this over a year ago, and I am currently searching for who I am/want to be, and I think this will help me along the way...
I encourage everyone to try this out and leave it in the comment section, on your own blog, or in your own head. It truly is a fantastic self-assessment and way to get things off my mind.

If you really knew me you would know...

If I could choose to spend a day alone or with a group of friends, I would rather be by myself.
I am currently wishing that I would have chosen a school closer to home, but am too stubborn to transfer.
Even though it may seem like I have my life under control, I am seriously lost at sea right now.
I used to hurt myself, and even though I don't anymore it is forever going to be a part of my life.
I'm pretty sure that it is impossible for me to let anybody stay close to me for a long amount of time, I'm a fantastic people-pusher-awayer.
I have lost sight of my faith. I have become one of those hypocritical Christians and I am disappointed in myself for it.
I only recently came to terms with the fact that you and I are not/will not be together now or anytime in the near's like getting my heart broken all over again.
Nobody can really know me, because I have yet to know myself fully.
I oftentimes feel completely alone in this world, even when I am surrounded by people I know love me.
I hate the way my body looks currently, but I am not motivated to take action to change it.
The longer I think about my dream, the less realistic it's becoming...
I do not want to live to be old, I don't think I will pass the age of 60.
I struggle with anxiety more than I would like to admit. Some days are unbearable.
I do not like college nearly as much as I want to/should and when I say I want to drop-out I'm only half kidding.
My insecurities consume the largest part of my time/life/thoughts.
As much as I want to be a carefree, happy-go-lucky person, I have come to terms with the fact that I am actually a very grounded, very serious person...the kind I never wanted to be.
I will never be good enough.
I will never stop wanting to be more.
I have a terrible time giving up anything, including my pride.
I don't think I'm deserving enough for earthly love right now.
If you really knew me you would know that my insides are in shambles and I'm not entirely sure how to fix it.

Friday, November 11, 2011

B is for Blind Trust.

From the very first moment, the very very first.
I knew with absolute sureness that
you were someone, someone I could give it all to.
It took less than fourty hours, just under two days
for me to believe that you would never, never hurt me;
that it was out of your grasp to cause me pain.
Blind trust, an uncontrolled belief in you.
You, of all the people in the world, in the universe,
with your honey-suckle eyes and lips chapped from the wind.
You, always you.  
Nobody else has come close to grabbing my heart the same way.
Nobody else will ever see me so frighteningly exposed.
You caused me to close my eyes, to close my eyes and fall.
and just believe you'd be there to catch me.

This little bit of my mind was brought to you by Mrs. Jenny Matlock's Alphabe-Thursday.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

wishful thinking

forgiveness is one of the hardest things for me to accomplish.
how does one forgive another for hurts they caused?
how does one forgive oneself for the self-inflicted hurts?
my body's scars remind me daily of my previous self-hatred.
my heart is full of the memory of others' cruelty.
how does one forgive? how does one forget?
i don't have an answer, not even for myself.
it is a prayer i constantly repeat.
(when i even remember to pray.)
forgiveness is a spirit-fruit every person yearns for,
but only few achieve.
the rest of us just try our best to grasp at the
shirt-tails of it,
hiding the resentment behind false smiles, false apologies.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

A is for A Beginning.

A fresh start.
      A turned page.
           A brand-new, crisp fall morning. 
                A beginning.
           A baby's first look at life.
                 A morning-breath ladened kiss.
                      A small giggle in the middle of terrible things.
                 A  beginning.
                         A night of quiet love-making.
                 A secret-wish made real.
                         A closed door hiding it all.
                                A beginning.
                         An open door, uncovering secrets.
                 A tear shed, a bag packed, and a heart-broken.
          An engine starting and disappearing.
A beginning.   
          A snowflake harmlessly landing on a nose.
                 A baby's wail for an absent father.
                         A miniscule hope for something better.
                                 A beginning.

Brought to you courtesy of Alphabe-Thursday and Mrs. Jenny.  (This week is letter "A" if you could not tell.)