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Monday, November 26, 2012

deserving

"I just think you deserve better"  I was told.

Well, I do.  I deserve better than him.  He's not perfect, he doesn't always do the right thing.
But he's mine, and he deserves better than what I give, too.

How can I hold high expectations when I am such a tumultuous ball of uncertainty?
I can't.

He may not be perfect, but he is perfect where it counts.
He doesn't push me for answers I can't even start to give.  He doesn't question the reasoning behind my less-than-lovely moments.  He takes my moods and tucks them away without really feeling the venom in my words.  He holds me when he knows I need it and he let's go when even the gentlest touch makes me bristle.

"I know I deserve better" I retorted, looking out the window.  But there was no conviction, because somewhere inside my mind was the convicting idea that I have more than I deserve.

I'm no good, yet I'm blessed with someone who loves me even at my worst, without ever seeing my best.  Not many can say that.

We are just two people with damaged hearts and stories that hurt to share.

Someday we will be at our best, that perfection that deserves one another.